How to Build a Property Portfolio as a Couple (Without Breaking Up)
If you gave a builder two different blueprints for the same house, they’d look at you like you were nuts. And yet, that’s exactly how many couples try to build wealth together. One partner wants to invest aggressively, the other wants to feel secure in a family home. One is all about the numbers, the other leads with emotion. One’s thinking equity, the other’s thinking school zones. And because they never really sit down and get on the same page, they spin their wheels for years—debating, delaying, second-guessing—and never build the life they both want.
In this episode of The Australian Property Investment Podcast, I sat down with Arjun Paliwal from InvestorKit to dive into one of the most important, yet rarely discussed, aspects of property investing: doing it as a couple. What emerged was a conversation far deeper than locations and lending structures. We talked about mindset, health, partnership dynamics, and the simple but powerful systems that separate those who scale from those who stall. If you’re in a relationship and you’re serious about building wealth through property, this is the roadmap you’ve been waiting for. Watch it here.
Health Is Wealth—And We Don’t Say That Lightly
We kicked off the episode not with interest rates or suburb picks—but with health. And that’s no accident. Arjun opened up about a serious health scare he had last year: emergency open-heart surgery. It wasn’t planned. It wasn’t expected. But it changed everything. Coming out the other side, he dropped 30+ kilos, reset his focus, and made his wellbeing the number one priority. And rightly so—because if your health fails, your wealth doesn’t matter.
Think about it. What’s the point of a 10-property portfolio if you’re too exhausted, unwell, or mentally burnt out to enjoy it? We’ve both seen clients who’ve built impressive portfolios… but are miserable. And we’ve seen others who’ve built a sustainable life that includes both financial security and happiness. If your health—physical, mental, emotional—isn’t part of your wealth strategy, you’re missing the foundation. It’s not just about cash flow and capital growth. It’s about creating a life worth living.
Why High-Income Couples Get Stuck (Even With Great Borrowing Power)
You’d be surprised how many couples come through our doors earning six figures each—and yet they’re stuck on one or two properties. On paper, they’ve got it all: stable incomes, good savings, plenty of borrowing capacity. But behind the scenes? Indecision, misalignment, and emotional tension. One person wants to buy their forever home now, the other wants to keep investing. One feels anxious about debt, the other sees it as leverage. Without clarity, the strategy falls apart.
It’s not always dramatic, either. Often it’s subtle. You’ll hear things like “We were going to buy again this year, but we’re still unsure if we should buy a home first.” And just like that, another year slips by. It becomes this cycle of half-decisions and false starts. Arjun calls it “champagne taste on a beer budget”—where the desire is big but the execution never follows through.
The Cure? Get Crystal Clear on Your Shared Goals
The first step is the simplest—and the most overlooked. Sit down together and talk about your vision. Not just for the next purchase, but for your lives. What do you actually want your future to look like? What kind of lifestyle are you building? What level of income do you want in retirement? Where do you want to live? What kind of flexibility or freedom matters to you?
It sounds obvious, but most couples never take the time to really articulate this. When you set shared goals, something shifts. You move from being two individuals with separate ideas… to a team with a shared mission. You can align your strategy to that vision, and suddenly decision-making gets easier. It’s not about who’s right—it’s about what gets you closer to your agreed destination.
Divide and Conquer: The Business Model for Couples Who Invest
Once you’ve got the shared vision, the next step is structuring your roles. Think about your property journey like a business. No successful company has everyone doing everything. The CEO doesn’t run payroll. The CFO doesn’t do social media. Great businesses have clear divisions of responsibility—and great investing couples do too.
Arjun and his wife split their investing roles into macro and micro. He handles the big-picture stuff: strategy, location selection, acquisition timing. She handles execution: finance paperwork, liaising with brokers, managing insurance, organising contracts. There’s no micromanagement or double-checking—just trust. And that’s key. When each person owns their lane, you stop arguing over details and start making real progress.
Not every couple will split things the same way. Maybe your partner is the strategy person and you’re the executor. Doesn’t matter. What matters is that each person feels empowered and supported—and that no one’s stepping on toes. You’re not fighting over decisions; you’re collaborating on outcomes.
The Rentvesting Debate: Turning Emotion Into Strategy
One of the biggest sources of tension for couples is the question of rentvesting versus buying a home. You know the story. One person wants stability. They want to nest, put up pictures, settle down. The other wants to chase equity and leverage into multiple properties before locking in a principal place of residence. This emotional tug-of-war can derail even the best-laid plans.
What Arjun shared was powerful. He and his wife had this exact debate. But instead of brushing it off, they broke it down. They looked at the time, cost, and stress of moving every year or two. They factored in hotel stays during transitions, removalist fees, and emotional energy. And guess what? Even with all that, renting still came out cheaper than a mortgage in their target area. More importantly, it allowed them to build their portfolio first—setting them up for a better home purchase later.
If you’re struggling with this conversation as a couple, try removing the emotion and doing the math. Run the numbers. If it makes financial sense to rent and invest, then anchor back to your shared goals. What’s more important—painting walls this year, or buying time and options for the next ten years?
Routine and Rules: Run Your Portfolio Like a Business
Investing should not be a once-every-five-years kind of activity. The best investors operate on routine. They review their valuations yearly. They meet with their broker annually. They set KPIs—how much they want to save, how many deals they want to do, what their next purchase should achieve.
Rules matter too. Just like businesses have financial rules—buffers, budgets, reinvestment ratios—so should your portfolio. For example, you might set a rule that once your buffer exceeds $50K, the next $20K goes into a deposit. Or, you might review your properties annually and draw equity only if you’re above a certain loan-to-value threshold. These rules remove decision fatigue. They give you a roadmap so you’re not constantly asking “Should we invest again?” You already know when and why.
What If You Want the Dream Home and the Portfolio?
This is the question I hear all the time: Can I do both? Can I build a portfolio and own my dream home?
The answer is yes—but it takes discipline, sequencing, and trade-offs. For some couples, the best approach is to delay the home until the portfolio has traction. For others, it means buying a long-term family home now—but avoiding the trap of constant upgrades. As Arjun pointed out, if you’re always upgrading every few years, chasing the bigger backyard or the nicer suburb, you’re constantly resetting your mortgage and slowing your momentum.
What works better is buying a home you can comfortably live in for 10+ years, and then focusing on investment properties that deliver passive income. And don’t forget, your home is capital gains tax exempt. If you downsize later, that equity can fund a debt-free investment portfolio. So yes, it’s possible—but only with intention and planning.
The Silent Killer of Wealth: Lifestyle Creep
Here’s the trap most high-income earners fall into: as their income goes up, so does their lifestyle. A nicer car. More holidays. An upgraded kitchen. And suddenly, the surplus cash that could have been invested gets swallowed up by consumption.
We talked about this at length in the episode. Delayed gratification isn’t about never enjoying your money—it’s about being smart with timing. Just because you can take on a $1.5M mortgage doesn’t mean you should. Just because you can buy the new BMW doesn’t mean it’s the right move now.
Discipline compounds. If you can hold off lifestyle upgrades until your portfolio is humming, the payoff is exponentially greater. And down the track, you won’t be saying no to your kids or to experiences. You’ll be saying yes—without stress.
DIY vs Done-For-You: What’s the Smarter Play?
Let’s address the elephant in the room. Can you invest successfully without using a buyer’s agent? Sure. Plenty of people do. But here’s the catch: it’s slower, harder, and riskier.
Most DIY investors take 6–12 months to buy a property. Arjun’s clients? 2–4 months. That time difference isn’t just convenience—it’s lost compounding. It’s missed capital growth. It’s the cost of inaction.
More importantly, buyer’s agents bring access. Arjun’s team secures 70% of their properties off-market. These are deals the public never sees. And because of their volume and relationships, they get first dibs on stock, better insight into price movements, and more influence with agents.
Execution matters more than education. You can read all the reports and listen to all the podcasts—but if you don’t act, nothing changes.
Clarity, Not Just Property
At the end of the day, property is just a tool. The real wealth is clarity.
Clarity about what you want.
Clarity about your timeline.
Clarity with your partner.
Clarity in your strategy.
Clarity in your next move.
When you and your partner get aligned—really aligned—everything else becomes easier. You’ll stop second-guessing. You’ll stop stalling. And you’ll start building something that truly reflects the life you want to live.
If you take one thing away from this episode, let it be this: the most important real estate you can ever develop is the space between your ears. Because when your mindset is strong, your vision is clear, and your partnership is united—there’s no limit to what you can build.
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